Can you live a whole life based on lies?
Can you live a whole life on a lie?
Lying to yourself or others has a frighteningly strong power.
Because you can easily lie to yourself and thus also manipulate both yourself and the people around you with your words. Your subconscious cannot distinguish between right and wrong, it is forced to accept what you choose to imprint on it via your senses, which is let in via your logical consciousness and into the subconscious.
With a lie, you might often get what you want, and you will also be able to get away with a lot that you don't want anything to do with.
Things you don't want to deal with, but want to push onto others.
I had a conversation not so long ago and it is NOT the first time this topic has come up.. this is what several people think about:
"Everything you say about Merete is so true and I really see the value in it. But that's how I meet people on a daily basis, who seem to do things entirely for their own gain, they cheat and deceive. And they seem to be doing so well , (there were even some examples given, which I won't go into here, but it was about people doing dirty work, people breaking the law and stepping over corpses to achieve what they want.) And it seems, at least from the outside, that they live their lives in the best way, without a hint of bad conscience.. they make money and have everything they can dream of.
So how should I explain this to my daughter, or son.. we should, on the one hand, raise them to be upright, good people, with empathy and the ability to take care of themselves and others, and give them lots of love. . and when, on the other hand, I know that I am sending them out into a world that is so brutal. Where they will therefore meet people as mentioned above..”
So, why not just lie and deceive.. like them?
Is there any point in cultivating good qualities such as politeness, respect, honor, honesty , empathy and integrity etc. ?
I can well understand that the person in question asks these questions, I have done it myself and you can easily lose heart if you look out into a cold world. And not least, we worry about our children and how we can best give them good values throughout their childhood and youth, while at the same time preparing them for what is to come. We don't want our near and dear ones to be hurt and treated badly, so maybe we try to dress them in suitably strong armour, but I rather believe that with cleverness and knowledge they will manage well anyway. The best we can do is teach them to think for themselves.
As a fairly outspoken person, I have really experienced resistance when I have challenged a person's life lie. There is a saying: "take away from a man his life lie, and you take away his life" I have no idea who said it, but there is probably something true in it.
But what is a good reason NOT to lie, why should you try to develop and expand your awareness of life and being a good person?
There can be many good reasons why you shouldn't lie, but one good reason is that if you lie all the time, eventually you won't be able to trust yourself once. If you constantly lie, eventually you will have no one to turn to but yourself. And when that time comes in life when you can't even trust yourself, i.e. when you have imprinted such a strong conviction that you have the right to deceive and lie, down in your personality, that you lie so you believe it self. Then you're stuck.
As mentioned earlier, our subconscious cannot distinguish between right and wrong, it is totally deductive. So if you have stopped thinking consciously about the fact that you are lying, this is eventually stored as a habit pattern, a behavioral pattern, that is how passionate liars become... they simply do not know that they are lying themselves. Then you can even fool a lie detector.
Then you are faced with a real crisis in life and you will have to make decisions based on who you have become, and that decision will be terribly wrong. I have seen people sink to their knees when they are forced to face their true selves.
Because then you stand there, without being able to think a clear thought, without the good perspective, which will be necessary to solve your situation in a good way. Because what you have filled yourself and your consciousness with are untruths, rubbish and other people's suffering. Your logical brain may still doubt that you were in the right, but your heart, your subconscious that carries your self-image, your own belief in you as a human being, your original authentic self, knows better.
So that's why, when I get questions like this, where people look at people who apparently surf through life without a thought for other people like I've talked about here, I think what they do is simply not my business. And it shouldn't be yours either.
We are not the ones who have to live with this, and if it punishes itself????... Well ... maybe, maybe not..
See that is something, I think we should leave it to life itself, if they not by then are caught by the law inforcement.
What can appear to be a happy and carefree life, really doesn't have to be anything to brag about if you scratch the surface.
I don't mean that you should always be silent, you should of course use your voice when you or others are treated unfairly. There are times when it is appropriate to speak out with clarity.
And in connection with society's, I call it "blind" focus on sustainability, where one of the UN's sustainability goals, no. 5 is about equality. We only scratch the surface. There is no doubt that the people we have in companies and society, and not to forget every person on our earth and those creatures with whom we share it, are our greatest resource, but for one reason or another this has been completely sidelined in the last 150 years that we have lived here on the planet.. that is, ever since Darwin came up with his theory of evolution, saying that it is through competition that the strongest survives. Is this really true? Really?
It is probably true that it applies to some animals, but there are countless examples of the opposite... that it is through interaction that we will actually achieve the greatest success and manage to look after both people and the planet.
In my working environment, attempts are made to increase people's awareness of equality and diversity, as well as to create a safe and good working environment. There must be zero tolerance for discrimination and harassment.
BUT OF COURSE IT IS, IT ALWAYS HAS BEEN.. WHAT HAS CHANGED?
Some of us who have been in working life for a while have learned that there are certain codes and limits that should never be exceeded . It can be very individual and person-dependent, but there are certain things you just never say or do to other people.
But today I see, based both on what I experience among the people I work with and on the fact that I have young people in the house... a violently negative trend has been allowed to take root. It has become common to use exceptionally coarse jargon.
There are dangerously many young people who are unable to read social codes, such as facial expressions and body language.
Many people wonder if we are raising a digitally dumbed-down generation. ARE WE?
It has nothing to do with young people not being smart and having many good ideas, but I am afraid that they will lose something along the way, when, according to Statistics Norway, they spend almost 6 hours of their day on mobile phones or computers, and in the apps that used for social interaction, the use of language is insanely ugly. It's insanely much easier to write nasty things online than to say it directly to a person's face.
And since they are so "invisible" all this that takes place online, it has escaped the radar of many parents... at the same time, we adults are also caught up in the same problem... Not a few of us use the internet for as long as children and young people.. A third of the adult population uses some form of digital screen between 4 and 6 hours every day... and on average it is said that we check our mobile nearly 150 times a day...
But it turns out that over time now, the ugly use of words, the jargon has also spread outside the online world. I have sat and eavesdropped on conversations, out in the workplace and elsewhere in society, between both boy gangs and girl gangs in their teens AND adults, and I am totally blown away.
They say we have to tighten up, but I don't think that's the way to go.
Companies and schools make a clumsy attempt to educate and inform... they talk so nicely about raising awareness..
At workplaces we are encouraged to talk about what is okay or not okay... that it should be raised to something we talk about at lunch...
Of course, raising awareness is important ... we should and must do that..
There are things that need to be repaired in each individual, on a deeper level
Punishment and other corrective measures will not work.. remember that people generally do the best they can, based on the point of view they have and the awareness they have. If they really had the abilities to see what they actually did and inflicted on people and society from a higher perspective, they would never have done it.
I am so passionate about us building bridges between generations, the way corporate life now works to bring in more and more younger people... to the benefit of adults and experienced people.. degrades the quality of working life. More than ever, young people need people with experience and wisdom by their side.. someone who is confident enough to speak up when something is not right.
Society's glorification of youth and glossy images on social media creates a false image of how reality works. The suicide statistics are dramatically increasing, according to figures from psykologik.no, 482 boys and men took their own lives in 2022... about 650 people in total.. 650!!!!
According to forskning.no, there are fewer suicides in Europe, but not in Norway. WHY?
I can't sit and watch this... without trying to do something about it.
After all, we are talking here about an entire system that is out of order ... and the way authorities and business leaders now face the problem is by using awkward information meetings with motivation that are supposed to lift...
But motivation is a commodity, if we don't maintain the pressure, then nothing will happen.
Every single person, in every organisation, job, school, family, leisure activity... has a programmed behaviour... inherited genetically or influenced by the environment they grow up in. This programming becomes the filter through which all information is filtered through... If that sieve has holes for the type of things that I have talked about above, then it will mark their habits and behavior for the rest of their lives. It is showing up in society and we are facing a huge problem already.
But we can do something about it, and the only way that will work is for us to become conscious enough to turn our gaze inward… . And start with ourselves. It's no use changing the system directly.. then we bang our heads against the wall, and we can see that in people who work in the healthcare system, schools and other professions where they get this close to life, and try to change themselves directly... that 's david against goliath .. but the difference here this time is that david is unable to kill goliath .. because he doesn't have the right tools to deal with this problem!
We must turn our gaze inward, find the tools... develop ourselves, and through our change, through our knowledge and with a new perspective on society, and problems, we will find new methods.
(yes, I did write problems, not challenges.. because we have problems.. at those problems are challenging!)
We have a vision to change things, one person, one thought at a time, through personal development and mental training. We believe in people, but we also believe that we all need help, that we must interact... and eventually connect together like a battery pack.
That's the only way we can bring large systems to life..
Many will say.. oh my god.. it's never going to work..
But then I'm going to tell you something very uplifting.. (and at the same time a little scary):
When a population starts to change its attitude, it is not a democratic rule that applies at more than 50% that applies..
Imagine then that the population in Norway is the 100% one.. If we were to manage to change just a few percent, it would be very decisive.. Say if some and 20% gather in a group.. then all the other 80 % scattered around in many different opinions and perceptions.. it is not 20/80.. but rather 20/10/10/30/10/15/5%..
It sounds a little better … doesn't it? I firmly believe that around 23% is a tipping point, where it starts to shift in a population.. things start to happen.. and with today's technology it will go faster than we know..
I notice that there has been a huge difference since the 80s, when I had my first feeling of personal development and growth.. at that time I was very alone.. there were not many.
At the same time, there is also an extremely increasing polarity, both in Norway and in the rest of the world..
Political walls are erected, people are alienated, there is war, there are refugees who after drowning... are only called casualties .. they are patients not called patients longer, but users.. when I even heard that certain circles in research and the medical profession are starting to call people biomass.. Then my limit was reached a Looooong time ago..
I don't know, but I think you've noticed, life tends to give you lessons, and each lesson is presented to you in different forms, until you learn it. And my opinion is that there are no mistakes, only lessons learned. Personal development happens through a process of trial and error, whether you are aware of what is happening or not, you are constantly experimenting. Both what goes wrong and what goes well are an equally important part of learning... without that we don't grow as people.
If someone chooses to stand still, or even appear to be going backwards evolutionarily .. then it will inexorably lead to doom, one way or another, because if they can't see it.
It is said that other people are only a reflection of you. That you cannot love or have anything or anyone unless it reflects something you love or hate about yourself.
What others do with their lives is up to them. What you do with your values, your life, your children, your people, what kind of values and truths you want to believe in, it's up to you!
You have all the tools and resources you need. What you do with them is up to you. The choice is yours!
So instead of looking at others, turn your gaze into yourself. All you need to do is follow along, listen and have faith that what you are doing is right. And let nature take care of the others, if there are enough of us who care, they will soon be a dying breed.
"In times of change, it is those willing to learn who take over the world,
while the learned must come to terms with the fact that they live in a world that no longer exists" - Eric Hoffer -
There are a lot of people out there who need your help.. your vote counts. Learn to use it!
The most effective solution is to start with yourself, and then the others will follow.. if they are ready... It starts with ONE person, and that is you... and it starts with what you allow your head to be filled with. Because we humans do not act on the basis of what we consciously think, but what we allow to sink into our personalities which affects our behaviour.
Phote: National Geography
Our thoughts are energy… . Our hearts are a magnet.. what you send out in thoughts and actions will in return be attracted to your heart.
You reap what you sow, you get back what you send out... Shit in = shit out !
Make sure that you send out some really good stuff, because it also has an effect on me and everyone else on this planet!"
Your surroundings are only a reflection of what is happening or has happened inside you.
What you have thought, what you have done, always shows in the kind of result you get.
What have you stamped down... what has become part of your paradigm, your programming.. what do you think you are capable of doing.. remember that your self-image limits you and what you think you can achieve.
A society is only a collection of individuals.. each individual has their paradigm, a programming that affects what they say, habit patterns and behaviour ... collectively it becomes a societal paradigm.. with the complexity of the individuals all mashed together..
Listen to your heart, what you want, who you want to be.
Follow it, it never lies!